Competition- Is it healthy?

Competition- It makes us strive to win and yet it can make us so unhappy. So when is it ok.. Looking at how the UK perform in sports, something stops us not quite getting there. Could it be that we are not competitive enough? Is it the very thing which makes many of us gringe at the US Americans, that we lack.. the drive to win, is there a horrible trade-off between being likeable and being a winner? I once was shocked after Sep 11. hearing an US lady state that she believed this was due to jealousy, but maybe this very arrogance is what we need to win. The question then is, how can we switch being competitive on and off? I remember how I once (one time from many) gave up the basketball, as it seemed unpolite to keep fighting...Not the worlds best basketball player, but is it not this lack of competitive drive that makes us likeable?
Once we are out of the sports situation, what makes us competitive, now I no longer think it is arrogance but insecurity.